Moderation vs. abstinence, which approach is right for you?
If you are struggling with your drug and alcohol use, then perhaps you have wondered if it’s possible for you to just cut down and moderate your use, or if you have to stop completely. This is a common question I get asked in my practice and it’s an important consideration because many people will agonize over which approach to take instead of just getting started on your recovery journey.
In general, it doesn’t matter so much how you try to address your drug and alcohol use, it’s much more important that you start on the journey. The best approach is the one that works for you. If you don’t feel you can effectively quit completely your drug of choice, you can try starting with moderation to see if that works for you. Don’t let this decision get in the way and be an excuse for you not to start your recovery at all.
Once you have the motivation to start addressing your problem, there can be more specific reasons why one approach or the other might suit you better, including how serious the consequences of your drug use are, and how much self control you feel you have, and what your drug or drugs of choice are. I’ll explore some common considerations when approaching the question of moderation vs. abstinence so you can get started on your recovery journey today.
Severity of consequences
Whether or not moderation would work for you often depends on how serious the consequences are that you are experiencing because of your use. If you are having life threatening, relationship ending or otherwise serious consequences that you need to get a handle on immediately, then perhaps abstinence is the only route for you. On the other hand, if you are struggling with your drug and alcohol use but the consequences are not rising to very serious proportions, perhaps you have more leeway to experiment with moderation.
What qualifies as “serious” definitely depends on the person, but I have compiled a list below of some common consequences of drugs and alcohol to help you gauge whether or not moderation or abstinence could be appropriate.
More serious consequences
Life threatening health consequences
Losing your job or suffering financially
Suicidal or homicidal thoughts
DUI, DWUI or other behavior that endangers yourself or others
Close relationships ending
Less serious consequences
Mild depression or anxiety
Isolation from social circles
Not reaching your full potential in life
Mild, reversible health consequences
In general, “more serious” consequences are not reversible, and call for an immediate and serious response like rehab, abstinence, and support groups. “Less serious” consequences might not be ideal, but they are generally repairable and reversible, and might give you more time and leeway to experiment with moderation to see if it might work for you.
Self control
Moderation of your drug and alcohol use generally will only work if you have some control over your drug use and still have a strong self control. If you don’t have enough self control to stop when you need to, then moderation generally will devolve into unrestricted use. Moderation can be a more difficult approach than abstinence because you have to work in the grey area between unrestricted use and stopping completely. If you want to succeed at moderation, then self control and having clear and strict rules for yourself around your use are essential.
Drug of choice
Another factor which will affect your ability to moderate your drug or alcohol use is the type of drug or drugs you use. Physiologically, some drugs have a stronger effect on your self control and ability to moderate, while others might not have such a strong chemical pull on your decision making process. While every person’s situation is different, and everyone’s relationship with drugs will be different, here are some common drugs sorted by “stronger” or “weaker” affect on self control.
Drugs that could be harder to moderate
Heroin and prescription opiates
Methamphetamine
Cocaine and crack
Nicotine
Benzodiazepines (xanax, valium, etc)
Alcohol (for some people)
Drugs that might be easier to moderate
Marijuana
Psychedelics (LSD, Mushrooms)
Ketamine and other dissociatives
MDMA, ecstasy, “molly”
*Please note that everyone reacts to drugs and alcohol in a unique way, and your own relationship with drugs might not accurately be reflected in this list.
If you are using a drug which has a strong effect on your willpower, maybe abstinence is needed in order to get your use under control. If you are using a drug which is traditionally less addictive, then perhaps moderation is more possible.
Experiment with a 30 day reset
If you’re not sure where to start with your drug and alcohol recovery journey, a good place to begin is with a 30 day period of sobriety to “reset” your relationship with drugs and alcohol and start on your journey with a clean slate. Whether you want to quit completely or moderate your use, starting with a 30 day period of abstinence can help you clarify your goals, your self control, and will give you a baseline from which you can explore other approaches to recovery if you like.
For many people it is harder to go from using drugs every day to moderating and only using on the weekend, while it is easier to start from a period of not using at all and then reincorporating moderate use of the drugs. Starting from zero can give you the clarity and confidence you might need to engage in a moderate relationship with alcohol or your drug of choice.
Support
No matter what journey you choose in your recovery, getting support so you don’t have to do it alone is essential. Whether you find support in the form of recovery meetings, online forums, or in therapy, finding a place to share and get support from other people will greatly increase your chances of success.
If you are looking for support in your drug and alcohol journey, feel free to reach out for support. Pacific Psychotherapy offers drug and alcohol counseling to help you moderate or quit in Santa Cruz, or online anywhere in California. Reach out today with any questions or to schedule a free and confidential 20 minute phone consultation.